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几首英语打油诗

  LIMERICK
  
  A limerick is a five line verse with the rhyme scheme of aabba.
  
  The a-lines should have five feet, while the b-lines have only three feet.
  
  It is normally, but not always light or humorous.
  
  A Day Challenge
  
  You take up the challenge to write,
  
  then stay up all day and all night.
  
  To think of a verse
  
  can be a real curse.
  
  You want all the words to be right.
  
  Don't worry if your words sound daft.
  
  Remember it's only a draft
  
  and then if you're wise
  
  next month you'll revise
  
  and wonder if others have laughed.
  
  You might have enough for a book.
  
  If you haven't, don't cry or sook.
  
  Sit down and write more
  
  than you did before.
  
  When it's published I'll have a look.
  
  I wish you success with your dreams.
  
  It's easy if we work in teams
  
  so all in due course
  
  lets give it more sauce.
  
  It isn't as tough as it seems.
  
  Kitchen Capers
  
  There’s capers afoot in the kitchen.
  
  The cat is quite drunk and it’s twitchin’,
  
  It drank two pints of ale,
  
  Then lapped up a cocktail,
  
  Danced a jig then said, “It’s bewitchin’.”
  
  Why?
  
  Two towers crashed down from the sky
  
  Causing innocent people to die
  
  Terror and war
  
  What is it for?
  
  I never will understand why
  
  A Limerick for Paul
  
  A middle aged man called Paul
  
  Said 'No' when his angel did call
  
  Please go away
  
  I want to stay
  
  I'm living and having a ball
  
  I know that I'll meet you one day
  
  But for now just please go away
  
  I'm writing a book
  
  If you want you can look
  
  Just go and let me have my say
  
  I'm good you can check with my wife
  
  But sometimews I find I'm in strife
  
  Don't pinch my car
  
  Or you won't get far
  
  And I'll make you pay with your life
  
  I don't want to meet the Grim Reaper
  
  But he seems to think he's my keeper
  
  Now's not my time
  
  I'm busy with rhyme
  
  He'll just have to dig that grave deeper
  
  Christine
  
  There once was a girl called Christine
  
  She smoked far too much nicotine
  
  She coughed and she spluttered
  
  The Doc came and muttered
  
  She has to go in quarantine
  
  Monique
  
  There once was a girl called Monique
  
  She had such a perfect physique
  
  Her bust is so round
  
  But mine can't be found
  
  Beside her I feel quite a freak
  
  Bertie and Gertie
  
  A couple called Bertie and Gertie
  
  Said life will begin when you're thirty
  
  You lose inhibition
  
  Try any position
  
  Enjoy getting flirty and dirty
  
  Ask
  
  Don't read your teenagers diary
  
  Life at home could become fiery
  
  It's an easier task
  
  More respectful to ask
  
  Just make a discreet enquiry
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